A few years ago, I was doing one-on-one tutorials for a series of consultants to introduce them to the blogosphere.  I told them blogging stands on a three-legged stool: posting, linking, and commenting.  In order to be successful, you need to do all three because a blog (personal or professional) is not your opportunity to push “send” on your opinions to the world, it’s a conversation.  The idea is to generate an intellectual, perhaps sometimes spirited, discussion on a topic that a number of folks can benefit from by adding their point-of-view.

The A-list bloggers still have a lot of conversation going on at their blogs, but I’ve realized many of us not in the A-list league have simply moved blog conversations to other social settings: facebook, friendfeed, and twitter.  I’m wondering if that is a mistake.  By commenting on a blog, you leave a thoughtful response to the author’s post in a place where it logically belongs.  Fragmenting conversations off onto other platforms dilutes some of the value of the “conversation” effect.  I’m guilty of this as well, and thought I’d make a more concerted effort to comment on blog posts I value.  Unless you throw in with the “blogging is dead” crowd, I urge you to step up the commenting as well.

Just sharing.

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I don’t like the word, “asshole.” I tell my kids when they’re tempted to use it to visualize it.  A good deterrent.  But like no other word in the marginally unacceptable words for polite conversation does “asshole” communicate so effectively.  If you’re labeled an asshole, you probably are, in other words.

Now, I’ve always wanted to read, “The No-Asshole Rule,” but never got around to it.  But from the title and the description, I get it and wholeheartedly endorse its premise.  I think it’s time to establish a No-Asshole Rule for the Social Web (#no-assholes).  Destructive jerks are disruptive and destroy the healthy fabric of the social web which is grounded on mutual sharing and civil conversation.  Disagreement is encouraged, but public abuse (especially personal abuse) should be outlawed by the community.

I have a personal history of being in an abusive, violent relationship.  It was many years ago, and I still bear the scars of that era in my life.  There were many occasions where I was being verbally and even physically abused and groups of people did nothing.  They watched in silence and then pretended it didn’t happen.  I never understood that until I took Sociology 101 in college and found out it’s very common for groups and individuals to not get involved when someone is being victimized.  An oddity.

But drawing from the courage it took to get out of that relationship, I’m writing this post.  It’s never acceptable to be abusive in any social or private circumstance.  Period.  Let’s crowd-source some civilized rules of engagement, shall we?  Let’s call out bullies when they’re bullying and direct our efforts toward cultivating a positive, helpful, social web learning experience.

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I’ve written many times about how the SocialWeb is teaching us and opening us up to a greater understanding of ourselves and the world we live in. This week, I witnessed first hand the power of relationships, the immediacy of the SocialWeb, and learned a great lesson in tolerance and understanding, and dare I say, faith?

I’ve written a few times casually about how I’ve been personally affected by the downturn in the economy. As a result of my own economic crisis, I was turned down as a worthy co-signer for Amie’s student loans. Mostly I have felt awful about the prospect that I would be the one, in the end, who stood in the way of Amie’s dream of going to New York University. Of course University of Texas, Austin is an excellent school, but Amie’s heart already moved into the dorms at NYU. For good reason, she convinced me over the past few months NYU is where she belongs and where she aims to fulfill her lifelong ambition to contribute toward improving our imperfect world.

Last week, Amie graduated with honors from Westwood High School. Here she is pictured at the Erwin Center donning her IB bling. I forced her to stand with the Capitol Dome in the background to snap this photo. You can see how enthusiastic she is by her expression about the prospect of linking her graduation to Texas and UT. The reward of graduating from such a difficult school in such a competitive program was eclipsed by the heart-breaking disappointment that Amie would not be returning East to continue on her academic journey. To Amie’s credit, she accepted her fate and began to let her friends in the Northeast know she would be staying in Austin.

On Friday, last week, I was “facebooking.” A friend asked me a question on my wall regarding where Amie would be going in the fall. The difficulties we’d been having had been chronicled on my Facebook page for months, so a wide range of my friends were curious about Amie’s ultimate college decision. When I responded to my friend that we were unable to send Amie to NYU and she’d have to attend UT Austin in the fall, I received a pop-up IM from another friend who was on Facebook at that moment. That friend was Greg Grosh. He asked me why Amie couldn’t go to NYU, and I explained all the details over IM.

Greg’s reply? “I’ll be happy to co-sign Amie’s student loans.”

My knee-jerk response: “Are you fking kidding me???”

As it turns out Greg, who is in what he calls his “second retirement” is affiliated with The Point Foundation which “provides scholarships, mentorship, leadership training and hope for students of merit who have been marginalized due to sexual orientation, gender identity or gender expression.” Greg is helping a few kids get through school and is willing to help Amie too. This news floored me on a few levels.

First of all, the cosmic connection here is Amie is more connected to gay friends and family than anyone I know. Her father is gay, in fact. I’ve always been mildly uncomfortable with the gay community that surrounds Amie. Greg’s generous offer has forced me to take a hard look at my own repressed intolerance. Reading the literature on the Point Foundation’s web site has done me a world of good. I encountered something similar (via Facebook again) a few months ago relative to racism. Who knew I was a racist? The SocialWeb that connects us is breaking down the ignorant walls that divide us. I’m living proof of the power of the SocialWeb to challenge our entrenched, stereotypical, ignorant biases by exposing us to new ideas and new freedoms.

The second meaningful outcome relative to Amie’s new opportunity is related to generational poverty. Getting Amie to NYU is symbolic to me. Although I’m certain Amie would have done well at UT, the opportunity to attend a private university should break the cycle of generational poverty that has been shadowing my particular branch of the family tree. I was the first one to attend college in my immediate family, although I never completed my education. There have been many debates over the value of a good education. I could probably argue both sides persuasively. My most convicted arguments would fall on the side of pro formal education, however. It’s taken a lifetime of “breaking the rules” to understand this, but in this new era of social mobility and connection, I believe it now more than ever. Further, if this is the generation that is going to finally set things right, they’ll need all the ammunition they can stockpile. And the reinforcements they’ll need will come in the shape of empathy, knowledge, and compassion for those people and places that exist outside of our comfort zone.

So, congratulations Amie. You’re going to NYU. Thank you Greg for your generosity, and thank you Mark Zuckerberg for keeping us connected and integrating our public and private lives. Oh, the biggest news here is Amie finally signed up for Facebook. My rebellious day-dream believer is now a digizen.

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Have I mentioned how much I love Animoto? Bought the yearly subscription last night. Here’s a fun video slide show of my trip to visit my daughter and grandson on Mother’s Day weekend.

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(I hope first, anyway.) If you consider yourself a guru on enterprise software and you don’t know my friend, Sandy Kemsley, I’m not sure you should. It would be nearly impossible to be informed in this space without stumbling into her blog posts, tweets, webinars, or comments and other contributions around the social web.

Confession: Sandy scares me a little. She’s wicked smart and is not only a role model for females in tech, she’s a role model for that other gender too. I first met Sandy in person in ‘07 at mashup camp. She waltzed in surrounded by developers– major geek street cred. Unlike me, she actually understood what was going on at mashup camp. Since that time, Sandy has been drafted into the Enterprise Irregulars and joins our growing female all-star minority. Sandy can out-tech most of the Irregulars, yet she does it politely and with style.

Sandy has one amazing skill that is admired in bloggers’ corners far and wide– she is a speed, live-blogger. While many of us are collecting our notes from a conference session, Sandy has already reported it, analyzed it, drew historical references to it, uploaded photos, and published it to her blog. HOW does she do that?

In my dreams, I would be Sandy Kemsley. (Plus, I’d get to live in Toronto!) For Ada Lovelace day and every other day, I celebrate Sandy Kemsley. Mad props.

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As I mentioned in the previous post, I’m helping to support Mobile Loaves and Fishes during this fun, frenzied SXSW season. Here are all the details you need to know for the #Twegg contest.

Short version is– help the homeless and win a kindle!

WHAT
With the help of some social-media savvy volunteers, Mobile Loaves & Fishes, an Austin nonprofit organization that feeds homeless and working poor people on the streets of five U.S. cities every night, is launching two contests in conjunction with SXSWi. The name for the contest– “Twegg”–has a dual meaning. The first part of the contest takes place on Twitter, and hard-boiled eggs are one of the most popular and important foods served from MLF’s trucks. See www.mlfnow.org/twegg

HOW IT WORKS

Twegg #1:

• Participants must be on Twitter and following Mobile Loaves & Fishes CEO and President Alan Graham @MLFNOW

• Until 11:59 PM on Saturday, March 14th participants must make one or more tweets about Mobile Loaves & Fishes or its mission to be considered eligible. Each post must include the hashtag #twegg to have be counted in judging.

• On Sunday, March 15th, a panel of judges will review each post tagged with #twegg and pick the best Tweeter. The winner will get a Kindle 2!

Twegg #2:

• This contest takes place at the SXSWi 2009 Plutopia music, art and performance extravaganza/afterparty on Monday, March 16–see www.plutopia.org

• Find the Mobile Loaves & Fishes volunteers with Easter baskets and bunny ears, and exchange your business card for a free, informative egg and the chance to win a Kindle 2!

• The winner will be announced at Plutopia between 11 and 11:15 PM (must be present to win).

WHEN

Twegg #1 takes place until 11:59 PM on March 14, 2009 and Twegg #2 takes place at the SXSWi 2009 Plutopia afterparty on March 16.

For more information, go to the Mobile Loaves and Fishes Twegg site. I will be judging the best tweets– so they better be good! I’ll be looking for the best tweets that respectfully show support for Mobile Loaves and Fishes and their mission. Good luck!

Here is a video segment generously donated by Andrew Shapter of Alan Graham and his work with MLF.

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I always like to hear the story (although I’m not sure it’s still in effect) about how Google permits its employees to dedicate 20% of their time to pursuing creative and innovative work of their own choosing. Here at the newly launched SoCo Partners, we’re instituting 20% time not for innovation, but for pursuing civic activism. I’ve chosen domestic and international poverty as my issue. Here in Austin, there are many ways you can contribute to helping the less fortunate. Here are a few causes I am involved with or with which I am planning to be involved:

1. For the past two years, my daughter and I have participated in Operation Turkey on Thanksgiving. Bryan Menell turned me onto this from Facebook when we first arrived in Austin. We love doing it. Every year it grows and is more impressive. I plan to do this forever more. Wonderful way to give thanks.

2. I’ve recently become involved with Mobile Loaves and Fishes. Last Friday I saw an Austin screening of “Happiness Is,” a beautiful and moving documentary by Andrew Shapter, a local Austin film-maker. Alan Graham, founder of Mobile Loaves and Fishes is featured generously in the film and participated afterward in a live panel discussion with the director. Alan said a number of things that completely changed my worldview regarding the homeless. In Austin we have many intersections where folks hold cardboard signs looking for help. The individuals are as varied as the messages they broadcast to the uncomfortable drivers waiting for the light to change (hurry light!… don’t make eye contact!). I’ve committed to helping Mobile Loaves and Fishes in any way I can apply my hands and heart and possibly socialweb and collaboration know-how to helping their cause. We are cooking up a fun project for SXSW called “Twegg.” Details are still being worked out, and I will be blogging on that shortly. Be sure to plan to attend Jon Lebkowsky’s Plutopia Monday night, March 16, which will showcase a large part of the initiative. Information on Mobile Loaves and Fishes (MLF) is available on their web site. Please considering donating.

3. I met Tina Williamson over a year ago at her Christmas party. Tina has launched a program called, “Women Worldwide.” Women Worldwide has as its mission to enable women to help other women around the world. She recently returned form a trip to Mali in Central Africa. You can hear Tina’s story about what her team did there and the inspiration for Women Worldwide over on vimeo. I’m helping Tina leverage social media to raise awareness for her initiatives.

4. I’ve become a student of poverty and am particularly interested in generational poverty issues. I picked up three books on poverty and have set aside time to read each one. I’m currently reading, “Nickel and Dimed” by a wonderful writer, Barbara Ehrenreich. She also wrote, “Bait and Switch” which has a lot of relevance for today’s economic downturn, as it focuses on white collar unemployment. A book I bought for the shock value of some of the demeaning language is “Bridges out of Poverty.” More on that one when I read it all the way through. I’m also subscribing to the Poverty in America blog on change.org. Learning a lot there.

It was @timoreilly who motivated me to “work on something that makes a difference,” while we’re navigating through the vagaries of economic turmoil. Even though in his most recent posts on the subject he wasn’t advocating pure charity work, it forced me to look carefully at what I’m going to commit my time to. My goal is to help my non-profit friends to learn how to leverage the social web to make their work more productive and rewarding.

Finally, the trailer from “Happiness Is.” Enjoy.

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Results can be seen here: Spreadsheet.

Thank you!

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A friend alerted me to this terrific site for charitable giving. Modest Needs makes giving personal by vetting qualified individuals, families, and organizations that need small donations to achieve a particular goal– like paying for a car repair, or keeping a utility on. It’s personalized giving and goes directly to help folks navigate through the vagaries of struggling to make ends meet. The tendency to hoard money during an economic crisis is natural. But remember, this is the most critical time to give to help others in need.

The signup takes less than two minutes. Check it out.

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A friend emailed me a note alerting me to an upcoming show for Clifford Ross, photographer. Ross has been commissioned to “create a monumental public art project for Austin’s new U.S. Federal Courthouse on Republic Square.” The Austin Museum of Art is holding an exhibit showcasing his work February 21 – May 17 at AMOA-Downtown.

I’m particularly interested in his Hurricane Series, pictured in the image below. From the press release:

For the Hurricanes series, Ross tracked storms starting in the Sahara across the Eastern seaboard on the internet. Between August 1998 and Sept. 11, 2001, the dramatic date of his last Hurricane shoot, he captured thousands of images of stormy seas. The six large photographs featured, freeze breaking waves to capture views of nature’s power that is impossible for the eye alone to perceive The expressive energy of these black-and-white photographs ranges from soothing to menacing and evoke visitor reactions that are just as varied. In contrast, the small 10 X 8-inch diptychs and triptychs of the Horizons series Ross created using a medium format camera, show quieter, contemplative views of the rolling surf.

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